MORE FUNNY STUFF PEOPLE SAY AND WRITE

You guys are playing under a whole 'nother ball game.

You're going to be chasing your tail 
down the rat hole.

I've been reading 
all the comments 
and wondering 
how best to pipe in.







I will tell you 
an antidote 
about my husband.

If we do that, we might 
unravel a house of cards.




















It's time for me 
to step up to the plate 
and sweeten the pot.

















City officials 
implored residents
to not leave hoses 
or facets running.

Read More

THE KRAKEN

A kraken is a humongous sea monster that attacks ships and sailors and gobbles them up.  Luckily, the kraken is a mythological creature.  Except that maybe the kraken is a not-mythical giant squid that some sailors saw, and then they started to make up stories about it, and it got lots bigger and scarier in the stories.  But the giant squid is scary enough without the legends.  Because the giant squid can be as big as long as 40-50 feet, including the tentacles, and they have supposedly attacked ships.

Drawing by Pierre Dénys de Montfort, 1801, from descriptions
of French sailors reportedly attacked by a kraken off the coast of Angola

Anyway, the first records of the kraken are in old Icelandic and Norwegian stories.  Even scientists used to think that the kraken really existed.  Like for instance, Carolus Linnaeus, who was always busy classifying stuff, said that the kraken was a cephalopod.  A cephalopod has a head that evolved from a kind of mollusk-type foot, and then it also has a bunch of tentacles.  Or something like that.  I'm not much into marine biology because I don't like getting my feet wet!

Painting by Bob Eggleton

In 1735, Mr. Linnaeus gave kraken the scientific name Microcosmus marinus in the first edition of his book Systema Naturae.  But in later editions, the kraken got left out, so maybe by then Mr. Linnaeus decided that this creature wasn't real, after all.

Another person who studied the kraken was Erik Pontoppidan, who was the bishop of Bergen.  He published a book called The Natural History of Norway in 1752-53, and he had a bunch of things to say about the sea monsters.  For instance, he said was that a kraken was "incontestably the largest Sea monster in the world" since it was a mile and a half wide.  Sometimes it was mistaken for an island.  But the biggest danger to sailors was the whirlpool that a kraken created.  Also, Bishop Pontoppidan added that "it is said that if [the creature's arms] were to lay hold of the largest man-of-war, they would pull it down to the bottom."  If you fished above where a kraken was hanging out, though, you could catch a lot of the fish that the creature stirred up.  So sometimes Norwegian fishermen risked their lives to do this.

Illustration from original 1870 edition of Twenty Thousand Leagues Under the Sea
by author Jules Verne

In the beginning, kraken were described as looking sort of like giant crabs or like whales.  But by the late 18th century, everyone was mostly saying a kraken looked more like an octopus.  The word kraken comes from Norwegian, and it means an unhealthy animal or something twisted.  The root word is the same as for the English words crook and crank.

Kraken have been very popular in literature and movies.  For example, they have appeared in Twenty Thousand Leagues Under the Sea and several other novels; in a sonnet by Alfred Tennyson; and in the films Clash of the Titans, Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest, and several others.  Also, kraken have shown up in video games, comic books, and in a set of 4 stamps showing legendary Canadian animals.  And for people who like to take a little drink now and then, there is The Kraken Rum, which is made in Trinidad and Tobago, and which was released in the U.S. in 2009.

Anyway, my advice to you would be not to get on any ships.  Because even though we are pretty sure the kraken is a myth, there's always a small chance that we're wrong!

Read More

SCHIPPERKES

Schipperkes are smallish black dogs with faces that look kind of like foxes.  They have prick ears and a ruff of hair around their necks. The weight of a Schipperke might be anywhere between 10 and 16 pounds.  Sometimes the puppies are born without tails, but other times they do have tails.  In the U.S., these tails are docked really short, but in most of Europe, it's illegal to do that.  Personally, I think they are cuter with tails because the tails curl over their backs, sort of like basenji tails, except hairier.  Schipperkes have a soft undercoat of hair that is covered by a harsher outer coat.  They shed a couple of times a year.

Schipperkes, circa 1897

The breed started out in the Flemish parts of Belgium.  It was bred down in size from a black sheepdog called the Leauvenaar.  Belgian sheepdogs come from this same ancestor breed.  Mostly, Schipperkes were used as watchdogs by tradesmen and on river barges.  The dogs were also good at catching rats.  Another thing they could do was nip at the tow horses' heels to keep them pulling the barge along.  The name Schipperke comes from the Flemish word schip, which means "boat."  A nickname for the Schipperke is "Little Captain" because the boat's captain was usually the one who owned the dog.

Photo:  Debbie Thompson

Nowadays, people who want a dog they can take boating often choose to get a Schipperke.  This is because Schipperkes like being on boats, and they don't get seasick.  While the boat is tied up for the night, the Schipperke will let their humans know if any bad people such as burglars are trying to get on board.

Image source: home.comcast.net/~pomerke/

The Schipperke's spitz-type ancestors are very ancient.  Other breeds that the Schipperke is related to include the Keeshund, Pomeranian, Samoyed, Norwegian Elkhound, Finnish Spitz, Japanese Spitz, and the American Eskimo Dog.
















Schipperkes were first recognized as a formal breed in the 1880s.  The AKC recognized the breed in
1904.  If you look at all the AKC registrations for Schipperkes, you will find the breed ranked 78 right now on the list.  It's not every day that you see somebody out walking a Schipperke, but yesterday Mom saw a person doing that, which is why she thought I should write about this breed.

By now, you are probably wondering if you would like to have a Schipperke of your very own.  These dogs have a lot of energy, so you probably need a fenced yard, or else you need to take your Schipperke out walking or running every day.  If they are bored, these dogs can get into a lot of trouble by tearing up stuff in the house.  Schipperkes are devoted and loyal.  They bond with their people, and they are good with children.  Also, they get along well with other dogs and with cats in the home.





Schipperkes are very busy little dogs, and they like to check everything out.  They can be suspicious with strangers, which is one reason they make good watch dogs.  It doesn't matter what size the intruder is or how big another dog might be.  The Schipperke will bark loudly and not back down.

You should always keep your Schipperke on a leash or in an enclosed area.  This is because if  a Schipperke  sees a squirrel or anything that looks fun to chase, he will take off running after it.  Some Schipperkes are good escape artists, and they can dig under fences or climb over them.  So even if you have a nice, fenced yard, you might want to keep an eye on your Schipperke while he is out there.









These days, people mostly use this breed for companionship and as watchdogs.  Schipperkes don't have a lot of health problems, and they usually live to be 10 to 15 years old.  Some even get to be 17 or 18.  I asked Mom if we should think about getting a Schipperke, but she said they are probably too energetic for us old dogs, and also for her, since she's pretty old, too!

Read More

MOM'S NEW JOB

Mom has worked at her new job for two weeks now.  Of course, Mom only works three days during the week, so even though she has worked for two weeks, she has only worked for six days.  But since Mom is almost as smart as a basenji, she has already learned a lot of stuff about doing her job, and here are some of the things she learned how to do:

1.  Answer the phone
2.  Run the cash register
3.  Say hello to customers and ask if she can help them
4.  Water the plants
5.  Sweep the floor
6.  Mop the floor
7.  Find somebody to answer all the customers' questions that she doesn't know the answers to
8.  Put price tags on plants
9.  Pet people's dogs when they bring them in to the garden center

Well, okay, Mom didn't have to learn how to make a fuss over people's dogs.  She's already had a ton of practice doing that at the Humane Society and also here at home!

On Friday, Mom took her camera to work so she could make a bunch of pictures for me to use in my blog.  And now I will show you the pictures.

Here is the front of the Soil Service Nursery, which doesn't look very exciting, but it is a nice building anyway.  A few years ago, there was a fire in the building, and it got remodeled inside, with lovely new bathrooms.

This is  one of the cash registers that Mom uses to figure out how much money people owe.  It has lots of pretty buttons on the screen that you can push.

These are some of the plants that Mom has to water.  You can't leave these plants outside in the wintertime because they will freeze, but you can put them outside in the summer.

You can also buy gloves to wear while you are gardening.

Or hats.

Other things you can buy are fertilizer, potting soil, and a variety of supplies to use when growing plants.  There's also stuff to get rid of ants and slugs and chipmunks and rats.  One year, Mom bought something called Rabbit Scram, because a rabbit kept eating one of our hostas.  Mom did not know that Rabbit Scram was partly made out of blood meal.  We dogs got very excited when Mom put the Rabbit Scram on the ground, and we started digging all around there, trying to find the dead rabbit!  So Mom had to put the hosta in a pot, and she gave the Rabbit Scram to Aunt LaDene, who doesn't have a dog.

Anyway, there is also a "Scram" for dogs and one for cats.  I think it's mean of people to try to keep these animals out of their yards, but no one asked me.

Another thing you can buy is stone benches or little statues to put out in your yard.  This angel likes to sit between the restroom doors.

Sometimes, big trucks come to the garden center, and they have a whole bunch of plants and trees inside them.  When a truck arrives, everybody gets busy unloadng it.  On Friday, a truck was already there when Mom arrived.  This truck had a lot of really big trees, so the men got everything out, and they used a forklift to move it all.  It took them five hours to unload everything from the truck.

A lot of the shrubs and evergreens live in this big space on the south side of the building.  All those evergreen trees with bags around their roots came out of that big truck on Friday.

There are fruit trees in a nice little line behind the building.  If you buy one of these, you can grow your very own apples or plums or some other kinds of fruit.

On the north side, there are three greenhouses, and one has perennial plants in it.  This is the one where Mom mostly likes to shop.  Also there is a greenhouse with shrubs in it.  Mom isn't sure what the third greenhouse has in it.

Out in front of the greenhouses are lots of small trees such as redbuds and dogwoods.  Also, that's where the roses are.  And on the left side of the greenhouses, there are big trees like maples and oaks and gingkos.  You can pay somebody to come to your house and plant your tree or whatever.  Mom is still trying to learn how much to charge for having this done, and also how to schedule the planting date.

Another thing Mom is trying to learn is where the different plants are located on the lot and in the greenhouses, so she can tell the customers where to go, so to speak.  If she could get out of the building and look around more, Mom could figure these things out better, but mostly she has to stay inside by the cash register and the telephone, especially on busy days.

There are a few annual flowers, such as pansies, in the nursery where Mom works, but most of the flowers are at the garden center part across the street.

Here's what I don't like about Mom's having a job:

1.  She's gone for hours and hours on the days when she has to work.
2.  She gets home an hour after our suppertime, so we are really hungry!
3.  She is really tired after working all day, so she doesn't want to do stuff like help me write my blog.


Here's what I like about Mom's having a job:

1.  Nothing
2.  Well, okay, maybe I like it that she will have more money to spend on dog food.

Read More

THE PERFORMING ANIMAL WELFARE SOCIETY

PAWS is a very special sanctuary in California where animals can go to live after they have been in circuses or in the exotic animal trade or other bad places like that.  A lot of times, these animals have been abused or neglected or injured.  Whenever the people at PAWS hear about animals being abused, they help with the investigation and rescue of the animals.  Then they give the animals a home for the rest of their lives.

The biggest sanctuary area that PAWS has is called PAWS ARK 2000, and it is 2,300 acres in San Andreas, CA.  Three African elephants, five Asian elephants, twenty-six tigers, six bears, and five lions live at PAWS ARK.  Other animals that PAWS provides sanctuaries for include mountain lions, a leopard, a coyote, a serval, a bobcat, two lynxes, and a muntjac.

What PAWS tries to do at its sanctuaries is to make a space that is as much as possible like the animals' native habitat.  There is plenty of grass and trees, and if an animal has special needs, such as having arthritis, there are areas designed just for them.  The best part is that the animals don't have to be chained up or bred or sold or forced to perform.  PAWS also tries to teach the entertainment industry and the general public about the humane treatment of captive wildlife.

PAWS was founded in 1984 by a woman named Pat Derby and her partner, Ed Stewart.  Sadly, Ms. Derby died this past February from cancer.  But she was a very brave champion for the rights of performing animals, and she inspired other people to feel the same way.  There are more than thirty people who work at PAWS, and these include keepers, wildlife specialists, and veterinarians.  They take very good care of the animals and try to give them healthy lives.

If you go to the PAWS website, you can learn a lot more about this organization, and you can read all about the animals that are there.  You can also watch videos of them, and you can adopt one if you want to.  Of course, if you adopt an animal, this doesn't mean that it comes and lives in your house.  Which is good, because an elephant would take up a lot of space in your living room.  What adopting an animal means is that you send a certain amount of money every year to help the sanctuary.

Ella, a capuchin monkey

I'm just going to tell you a few stories about animals that are living at the PAWS sanctuary, and if you want to read more, you can go to the website, like I said before.

The first one is Maggie the elephant, who was born in Zimbabwe.  She was captured in 1981, after her mother was shot.  At that time, people were culling the elephants so that there would be fewer of them to bother the people in villages.  In 1983, Maggie went to the Alaska Zoo and got to be best friends with another elephant named Annabelle.  After Annabelle died, Maggie was all alone.  In fact, she was the only elephant in all of Alaska.

Maggie

Some Alaskans felt sorry for Maggie, and they convinced the zoo board of directors to ship Maggie to a warmer place.  So that's how she ended up living at PAWS in California.  Now Maggie has two new friends, Mara and Lulu.  Maggie likes to break the rules and get her way about everything, and everybody mostly always lets her do that because she bats her eyes and looks very charming and sweet.

Nelson

Nelson Redford is a tiger who was born in 1996.  He was one of two tigers that got taken away from a man who was breeding cubs to sell.  Both of the tigers were in very bad shape, and they were practically starving to death.  The other one, who was pregnant, died, but Nelson pulled through.  He went to live at PAWS in 2003.

The black bear Boo Boo was born in a breeding facility.  When he was only two weeks old, he was taken away from his mother and sold as a pet.  The people who bought him put a chain around his neck, locked it, and then they lost the key.  So they couldn't get the chain off, and after a while, it grew into Boo Boo's neck.

Boo Boo

A woman who was worried about the bear bought him from his owners.  She took him to the veterinarians at PAWS and paid to have them do surgery to remove the chain from Boo Boo's neck.  After that, Boo Boo lived at the sanctuary, and when another black bear named Winston arrived there later, they became the best of friends, and they still are today.

Read More

OUR KITTENS ARE ONE MONTH OLD!

Guess what!  On Sunday our kittens turned ONE WHOLE MONTH OLD!  They just keep growing and learning all sorts of new and useful skills.  Of course, Mom still has not let any of us dogs or other cats into the room where the kittens are, so I have only sniffed them under the door and seen the pictures of them.  I would really, really like to go in that room sometime.  I don't care so much about meeting Eliza and the kittens.  I just want to eat the food that is sitting out in the cat dishes.  I know it is there because I can smell it.  Sometimes it doesn't all get eaten, and then Mom puts it in the garbage disposal, which is a terrible tragedy, if you ask me.

But anyway, I have a bunch of pictures to show you that will prove what the kittens have learned to do so far.

1.  WRESTLING -- The kittens have figured out that it's fun to play with each other.  And sometimes one of them squeals because another kitten got too rough.

Erica, Elton, and Etienne in a 3-way brawl

Etienne, Elton, and Erica take a break from wrestling

2.  GROOMING -- They're not very good at this yet, but they sort of try to lick their paws and other parts of themselves sometimes.

Elton licks himself while Erica and Etienne wrestle

3.  LOOKING CUTE -- Okay, the kittens have always had this talent, but now that they can toddle around pretty fast, they are cuter than ever.

Esmé has a darling little brown spot on one ear.

Edward

Four kittens looking at something

4.  USING THE LITTER BOX -- This is a very important thing for a kitty to learn.  Edward really likes to use the litter box, so he keeps showing his brothers and sisters how it should be done.

Edward peeing

Edward checking to make sure he really did pee.
Esmé and Erica are impressed.

5.  CLIMBING ON STUFF AND OVER STUFF -- The kittens are just starting to do this, but soon they will be climbing everywhere.  Mom cut the side of their box down so that they can climb in and out of it.  Also, the kittens are now trying to climb up Mom's leg.

Edward is about to leave the box.

Esmé climbs on the S-shaped kitty scratching thing.

6.  PLAYING -- Besides playing with each other, the kittens have discovered other interesting stuff to play with.

Edward learns that Mom's shoelaces make a fine toy.

7.  EATING -- Etienne started eating real cat food about a week ago.  The other kittens aren't so sure it's something they should put in their mouths. They think maybe their mom's milk is better.

Food tastes yummier if you stand in it while you eat.

Erica wonders what this water stuff is for.

Edward and Erica bypass the food and head for the milk bar.

"Mom, please open the milk bar.  We're hungry!"

Read More